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That's So Deep

Hello! It's Phyllis and Julie! Welcome to That's So Deep! We created this podcast because we found ourselves craving deeper conversations and deeper relationships. We wanted a place where we could be real, feel it all, lift each other up, laugh, cry and grow together. If this sounds good to you, then come hang out with us! We know that your time and attention are valuable so we hope you come away feeling a little more known, a little more connected and a little less lonely. Love - Phyllis & Julie

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That's So Deep

E. 7 Conversations: Are you a monologuer or a dialoguer?

January 07, 2022 • Phyllis and Julie • Season 7 • Episode 7

Hello So Deep Peeps!

Welcome to That’s So Deep. This is the podcast where we try to root out loneliness one conversation at a time. Today we are having a conversation about HAVING A CONVERSATION!

Some deep things we cover:

Interrupting means:
- You DON’T care: Interruptions can mean poor listening and show lack of care.
- You DO care: In certain cultures, interruptions and overlap can show engagement and that you do care about the conversation and relationship.
Monologuing - When people talk AT you instead of talk TO you, it can leave you feeling used, upset and lonely.
Talk Time Awareness: Are you aware of how much you are talking compared to how much the other person is talking?
Mutual Curiosity: You can only build deeper bonds with people if there is MUTUAL curiosity and interest in one another.
Check-ins and Rewinds: If you find yourself talking a lot, you can always check-in and rewind. Let your friend know you feel self conscious about talking too much and see if you can bring the focus back on them.
Generosity: Sometimes Phyllis’ mind is like a “disorganized house” and she finds she can be more generous in conversation when her house is in order.
Small Talk SUCKS! Let’s stop talking about the weather and start talking about our favorite smells!
Conversations are the little knots that build the bridge of relationship: Relationships take patience and are built one conversation at a time.
TMI: When is sharing too much just too much? If you experience what Brene Brown calls the “vulnerability hangover” then it is a sure sign that you have shared too much.

Take-aways:

Try having ONE good conversation with ONE person this week. Practice the following:

Ask good questions
Get curious
Bring awareness to your talk time
Try not to make the conversation about yourself
Try a wacky conversation starter: Free Gift — Awkward Silence

We want to have a conversation with you!

The whole point of this podcast is to facilitate and encourage deeper conversations and we want to hear from you!

Here is how you can reach us:

Voicemail: 805-288-0884

Email: sodeeppeeps@gmail.com

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We love you and we can’t wait for our next deep conversation!

Love,

Phyllis & Julie

Resources and articles we referenced in the episode:

Glennon Doyle: We Can Do Hard Things Episode 22 | Momastery : Real Talk: How can we begin to use conversation as a key to unlocking each other?
Steven Benbow: 20 Benefits of Conversation — Awkward Silence
Adam Grant: Adam Grant Status
Dr. Ellen Hendrickson: How to Deal With Loneliness
“vulnerability hangover” - Brené Brown: The power of vulnerability | TED Talk